Dr Carr is a GP specialising in family health in St Kilda, Victoria, Australia. Dr Carr has previously lectured in medicine at The University of Melbourne. London trained, Dr Carr moved to Melbourne in 88.
Published in numerous subjects including but not limited to sore throats, computing, baby sleep programs, enema (we will have to get into that one), sport, psychotherapy and more… He has a particular interest in the issues facing first-time fathers.
So much so Dr Carr published a book on the subject called ‘What Happens Now? The essential guide for first time fathers”.
Dr Carr not only practices medicine in the field but has 21 years of fatherhood experience with his 3 children.
I take Dr Carr through the standard Fired Up Dads questions, but I let the discussion guide itself given we have access to a true parenting specialist.
A candid interview exploring many aspects of parenting – DO NOT MISS THIS ONE.
Key Points of Interview (Part 2)
In part two we re-join where we left moving into the meaning of life experience Nick had at age 12. Nick believes that if you are not getting answers in life then you are asking the wrong questions. He turns this ethos on its head by stating that sometimes we don’t need to ask what the meaning of life is – that is when you are in the moment and that moment is sufficient – we don’t stop what we are doing to ask the question.
Nick advocates being in the moment with your children and that it is your children that can give you meaning in life.
We then do a deep dive into Nick’s book – What Happens Now?
We discuss the Chapter on sex and the inevitability of a ‘drought’ where physicality between husband and wife is limited. The discussion moves to how the woman may feel and then how the man may feel, affairs and how to come to an understanding of each person’s needs.
The discussion then expands into one of the other key features of the book which is physical contact with your children. We dive into what is and what is not inappropriate touch. We also discuss that both boys and girls need physicality, rough and tumble etc.
Nick confides in us an experience in the early years of his child’s life. It is a very candid moment and will help a lot of people.
What is your biggest worry when it comes to your children and how/what are you doing to mitigate these concerns?
We alter this question slightly to leverage Nick’s experience in family medicine and I ask him what he sees as the biggest concern coming from the parents he works with and/or what should parents focus on?
Nick confesses that he is not a worrier.
Nick talks about the fact that bad things do happen to our small people, but there is no use worrying because they tend to get through it despite our efforts and treatment.
What one thing would you change to help you be a better dad?
Nick would like to take criticism better.
- Favorite Dad Toy: Telling Stories
- Book: What Happens Next? Dr Nick Carr. Nick also believes that you should trust your kids to tell you what they need.
- Ensure time for yourself: Play Sport – Nick expands the discussion into the Exhaustion Competition.
- Innovative Discipline: Deal with it and get over it & tag teaming
- Family Tradition: Not to be exclusive.
- Personal Habit: N/A
This life is what we have so throw yourself into it. Don’t hold back – this is not a dress rehearsal.
Two last tips:
- Dads must do bath time – Nick elaborates.
- Don’t fall into the pedestal trap – Nick elaborates.